Vacuum

Long time not writing...April 2013 a busy month filled with new report request :) well more work means more blessing hahaa.. keep positive thinking. For spare time I still like to 'rearrange' quotes with nice pict and share them (at least I think it's nice).

Home is still cold...and this saying been rotating round round round my thought. 'It's hard when you're to tired to hold on.. but can't let go coz you love 'it' so much'. My heart is already shattered. In quiet night sometime I remember his unjustice, lies, temper, verbal abuse, I'm suffocated , felt big rock is pressed to my chess.

I'm trying and struggling to live my faith , forgive and love those who hurts you. And yes , I can't stop caring either..but my logic tells me to be more independent.

Now I'm still trying to let loose of those attachment, without hating -infact still love him as fellow human being- I find it uneasy , really have to be carefull balancing my heart...several time I almost slip to hatred easily. At the same time, I need to be emotionaly stable (balanced) and independent. 

I'm well aware that in the end we'll 'go home' alone, so why being too clingy to people or things too much?  As usual, easier said than done :)